Friday, December 7, 2018

...and so it has come to this after all these years...

My computer is trying to give up on me.  I can't shut it down, and therefore I can not update it.  I am having trouble importing photos, or finding them after the computer says the import is complete.
This has all added to my not updating this blog.  I really have resisted moving on to a different platform.  I have hoped or expected blogger to update.  I have thought it was amusing, looking through the blogs that are still here, all mostly religious in nature.  I needed this blog when an internet connection was hard to come by, and I couldn't email photos to all my friends unless I did a mass email, which always seemed to make people unhappy.  Since the time that I started this blog, Instagram has started, everyone I know finally started using apps for phone calls or to text.  Our long distance plans got inexpensive, so that I no longer even need an app.
Therefore, this blog turned into a place holder for me and my inability to grasp my own timelines.  So let me update myself.
This year I haven't been looking back.  I turned 50 and thought to myself- if now is not the time to be content and grateful- when is?
I had some really good personal events happen that I wouldn't share here except in a really cryptic form.  I met my sister in person.  She came to Stockholm with another of our siblings.  This turned out to be really good, and really important, I think to all of us.  I was also able to see how far I have come as a person- and I had a renewed sense of appreciation and love for my partner and all he has brought to my life.  
We have a plan to stay mostly in the Southern Hemisphere, so I took every opportunity to travel through Europe while I was there.  I tried to be present during all travels- and update Instagram just enough to later rekindle my memories. We essentially closed up our Swedish life, but I know that life is changeable and nothing is really over.

Here are some highlights in case I need to remember October-November

Friends helping
Apartment staging
Avoiding good-byes because they make me sad
Reconnecting with people I am genetically linked too
Reconnecting with my past in ways that felt appropriate and just fine
An attitude of adjustment...trying to be nicer to myself and others and not feel the need to waste time on trivial things-  
Clearing out closets - literally and metaphorically
Mentally laying down ideas towards a more purposeful life - where we are
All with the idea of 2019 starting anew