Tuesday, July 28, 2009

"...then I bedded back down, because I was sleepy..."





I have been healthy most of my life-a few random events like a kidney infection, or the time I got e-coli because I didn't wash my vegetables properly when I was on a juicing bender. I do, however, take mental days. I think of these as 'Grey Garden' days, because they involve not answering the phone, not answering emails, and flitting from project to project. I read a bit, watch a movie that will get constantly paused as I think of something I want to look up, or if the sun comes in and I want to lie in the warmth while reading a passage of some book.
This might seem attributed to the fact that I am a bit isolated here. No, I have always taken these days, even in school I would have the urge to cut on my walk in, and I would just get on a bus and ride until I saw something interesting out the window, then I would get off and explore. When I was older I would call in sick, and go sit up by the carousel in Griffith Park, well sick from my day job, my cash money job I would always go for, because there is something too irresistible about cash money. In Seattle I was so busy that mental days were always confined to after work or a Sunday.
The quality of these days have changed, now they are not about being out so much as being in. Sometimes, I do find the language barrier, the cultural differences, too much when Zok is away. This happens in Sweden as well, I will hide away in our room, with a stash of Godis, only coming out for a movie break to get a cup of tea. I try to combat this tendency by making lists of things that need to be done, or places I could go that I haven't been, or some craft to attempt. My brain though as sleep is contemplated can sometimes dispel that list away, as useless, or wasteful, this is when I become convinced that bed is where I am safest.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

i like this entry... kindred spirit. i have always taken those 'mental health' days when i need peace from the outside world. i think it's not only necessary but forward-thinking. i often feel like true quality of life is undervalued in America, in particular.
-Cara